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untitled #4

Aku hanyalah seorang keparat
yang sedari lahir memang tak berbakat
berlapiskan tanpa warna dan hanya pucat
maka tak henti dirimu berfirasat

pundakku kelu bila sedang beradu
beradu dengan sifat yang semaumu
hanya dengan berdiam dan membatu
maka puaslah seluruh nafsu besarmu

aku benci dengan perasaan tak biasa ini
seakan sebuah keharusan untuk dimiliki
tak mempunyai, tak bebas diri
maka itulah gambaranku saat ini

berat hati untuk berpindah sasaran
terlena dengan sesuatu yang menyegarkan
selama kau tetap berteguh dengan dugaan
maka selama itu pula jiwa ini berantakan

-Tangerang, 27072017.
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