Thoughts of a Man Called Aim

This year I'm turning to 21 years old. TWEnty ONe. This means I gotta make like a life roadmap before sh*t happens and f*ck my life up. To be honest, I haven't been thinking of having a relationship, hell even thinking of having a child. I admit that I'm not ready yet. Soon but not now.      I want to feel and live by myself for at least another 9 years, that's like when I'm 30 years old then I'll start thinking of what kind of relationship I want to have, how many children me and my partner want, where would we live, what our children's names will be, and a bunch of other adult stuff I don't want to think of for now. I still want to live single. I want to be a bad*ss uncle, walking around with a lot of money, gaining attentions wherever I go, and get all the ladies. No I'm JK. But yea the point is I want to enjoy the life of a single man before having a relationship which I imagine would be like in prison. You can't do anything freely because yo...

One of these days I keep thinking of what I once thought when I was much, much, much younger. Nothingness . The existence of one is absent. Basically nothing is existing and there is only nothing out there.      Back then I was curious of what would you do after your body dies. What would happen after that. I was thinking that our brain is what makes us human. Controls what we do, decides what food we are going to have for lunch, what position do you have in this world, etc. Without that we are not really a human. We would be just like animals, using instincts for their survival in this world. Then one time I came across the idea of what would happen after you die. Nothing. You can not see anything, you can not think of anything, feel anything, no heartbeat, everything that were attached on our human body. With that in my mind I started to contemplate life more often regarding of what can I do to be immortal even if my body would decease eventually, what would my legacy b...

For the last few weeks I've been struggling to come back to reality. I have been a bad person, not like I did commit crimes or anything, just that I was too naive about the world.      Sometimes it's good to have plans of your own and not thinking all the consequences. Being an idealist is hard but doable (if you have the courage and are willing to wait for god knows how long until it happens). Sometimes you just gotta throw all your dreams and aspirations. It just won't happen. In the times like this we have to move in a fast pace, while there are some that choose not to, ignoring process if I must say.       There's a famous word from my country that says, Idealisme adalah kemewahan terakhir yang hanya dimiliki oleh pemuda. Idealism is the last luxury that only youth have. -Tan Malaka      Well then I guess I'm starting to get into the boring adult life we all wanted when we were young which we regret instantly after we get it LOL. It'...